Today's post is contributed by E.B. Davis - Thanks for sharing your knowledge E.B.!
Contrary to popular belief, stress can be both negative and positive. The National Institute of Mental Health defines stress as your brain’s response to demand; which can be either real or perceived. The stress response is activated as a means to protect oneself. During the stress response, one will experience hormonal bursts, muscle tension, and an increased heart rate as well as an increased breathing rate. The stress response can be beneficial, in situations where you need to flee from danger; however, if your body remains in this response state for long periods of time, it can be detrimental to your overall wellbeing.
Stress can affect your mind, body and spirit. It can cause headaches, stomach aches, difficulty concentrating, overeating, under-eating, fatigue, depression, increased moodiness, and can lead to the use of mood changing substances (ie. cigarettes, alcohol, drugs and etc.) Everyone responds to stress differently; however, what is important to recognize is stress is real. It is not something of the imagination.
This is why it is important for us to learn to manage stress. Proper coping mechanisms can be life changing. The first step to properly coping with stress is recognizing that you are under stress. Sometimes the symptoms of stress can be very subtle, such as you overeating or sleeping often. Irrespective of the subtleness of stress, its effects still are powerful.
The second step to coping with stress is attempting to decrease it. To decrease your stress, you will first need to identify it. There are some stressors, which we can get rid of, such as toxic relationships. While there are other stressors, which we will not be able to get rid of, such as bills. Sorry bills are just a part of life. (Although, proper money management could help with money stress too.) Regardless of your ability to eliminate certain stressors, you can still manage it, so its impact is not as potent.
Thirdly, it is essential to discover what helps you decrease your stress because what might work for you may not work for someone else. Relaxing activities include reading, writing, praying, watching T.V. or talking. If you are not aware of what helps you relax, ask yourself “What am I doing when I feel most at peace?” It is important for you, not to confuse relaxing activities with laziness. Relaxing is an active and purposeful process and it is not avoiding stress but is combating it.
If you are still having difficulty determining what helps you relax, I suggest exercising, meditation/prayer, eating healthy, sex, and being grateful for the people as well as the things that you already have. Recognize that you do not have control over everything and let go of what you can control. Do your best daily and forgive yourself as well as others.
You will not be able to avoid stress but you can learn to better cope with stress. Healthy coping mechanisms can be life changing. So do not let the stress get you down. You are bigger than your problems.
Bio
E.B. Davis is a Licensed Social Worker and the founder of Cupid’s Planner. She provides relationship and intimacy coaching for the empowerment and sexual freedom of women. E.B. Davis wants to help every woman tap into their inner Goddess so they too can have Hassle Free Romance. Do you have a relationship question? Contact us at cupid@cupidsplanner.com.
